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BOTD 07-19-12 So You Think You Can Dance? A Katz B&W Production

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Skater

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Bransom Postmaster
SO, YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE?

A Katz Production

You have a step-son who is thirteen named Elliott. His father exited the picture when he was a baby. You have been married to his mother for a year. You immediately fell in love with Elliott and he was part of the reason you asked his mother to marry you. You are in the process of locating the bio-Dad so you can terminate rights and adopt Elliott. Elliott seems to be warming to you but the process is slow. He just recently started calling you "Daddy." You typically do not handle discipline issues with Elliott but his mother has asked you to be more involved and provide a "man's touch."

Elliott is part of an after school dance group. He loves it! You are very supportive of his craft. Elliott is good, very good. The problem is he knows it. Elliott is arrogant and insults the other boys. Elliott flaunts his talent and is rude to the other boys in the group. His attitude is affecting the morale of the group.

Elliott - 13 (Kid in very front)

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You arrive one afternoon to give Elliott a ride home and the instructor pulls you aside. She tells you about Elliott's arrogant attitude. She says she has talked to him several times but it is just getting worse. It is to the point that other parents are threatening to pull their sons from the group if Elliott doesn't rein it in. The instructor tells you that if Elliott does not change then she will have to expel him from the group. She asks you to intervene as he is talented and she would hate to loose him.

What do you do?


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Jkher

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Trailboss
We'll have a long talk, but I'm more inclined to withdraw him than spank him.

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AFinch

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Sherrif
If I've never been responsible for Elliott's "discipline" before, and we've not talked about it previous, I'm not going to bring down the hammer now.

If he loves dance as much as the scenario indicates, he'd be more devastated but not being able to go dancing anymore. And it sounds, from the scenario, that his behavior is going to cause that with no input from me or his mother.

I'm going to sit down and talk to him. I'm going to tell him what his dance teacher has told me--that he's in danger of being banned from class because of his own actions, and that, unless he no longer wants to go, he'd better straighten up and fly right.

I'm then going to tell him that although there is a song in "Funny Girl" called "I'm the Greatest Star", people who are truly great don't cop attitudes, especially when they are still learning their craft.

Hopefully, I'm going to get through to him. This does not seem to me to be a situation where I can teach him anything about arrogance and attitudes in dealing with peers by punishing him.

Padraig

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Trailboss
He certainly needs to be taken down more than one peg. I will discuss the situation with his mother and then we will have a talk together about actions and consequences. If we are a religious family, there are some examples in the Bible we can discuss. If it doesn't work, we will pull him out of the dance group as a warning. Hopefully that will do the trick.

Emlyn Morgan

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Trailboss
There is a lot of dancing talent about these days. I like to see it when it is well done. Dancing is certainly a good healthy interest for these boys, developing their skill and physical fitness.

Elliot loves dancing and is apparently very good at it. So, he had better heed the teacher's warning or he'll be out. I would support the teacher but suggest she could suspend Elliot rather than expel him.

David M. Katz

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Marshall
Emlyn Morgan wrote: I would support the teacher but suggest she could suspend Elliot rather than expel him.

I see this as an excellent idea.

I will talk to Elliott in the presence of his mom but I wonder if our words are going to have any avail as he has obviously been warned of the problem?

If he loves the class and the dancing as much as I suspect, a short loss of the privilege should be enough to rattle his cage and make him aware that the school (and his parents) are serious about the issue.

Even if my new son is the next Baryshnikov, it sounds like he could use a good serving of humble pie.


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Emlyn Morgan

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Trailboss
David M. Katz wrote:Even if my new son is the next Baryshnikov...

By the way, parents must guard against over-zealous, bullying teaching regimes. Overstretching of feet and limbs might cause long-term problems.

squarecutter

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Sherrif
This is not a matter for punishment but I think Elliot needs to hear what the teacher said, what was happening to the group as a

result and what might befall him if he can't reign it in. He is clearly a leader but he needs to help his group rather than belittle

them and thus improve the performance of the group much like a sports team. I will say that however good he thinks he is, that

someone with real class will help rather than undermine his colleagues. His mother will sit in on the chat and hopefully have her

own input. It could simply be that Elliot as the ONE in her life has to learn some socialisation skills along with the dance

skills. The only other question is how good is this group. Does he need to reach for one of a higher standard where he might not

appear so special

Guest


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Posting before reading other replies (and risking redundancy!):

I will have a man-to-man with Elliott. We'll talk about how someone with real talent needs to behave with others. It's wrong to make others feel inadequate.

"Son, recall when I was told that my work was better than that of 95% of my colleagues? I didn't rub everyone's face in it, did I? No. I thanked the fellow for his support and then I focused on being supportive to my colleagues." Wink

We'll talk this through calmly.

I'll then check with his mom about "part 2" of the plan, since I need her "on board": I'm going to offer E. a choice. He can withdraw from the dance program; or, he can accept a 'control plan' that will help him with his arrogance issues -- in addition to the 'positive' arguments I hope he's now accepted, he'll also have a negative deterrent: for any report of poor attitude (this is the dance equivalent of "poor sportsmanship" ... and, of course, physically, dance is as "athletic" as a sport) he'll get a spanking -- bare-bottom, with my hand, with a lick or two with a paddle to finish off.

I hope we won't get to the spanking ... really I do! Razz

P.S. I just "got the joke" connected with the boy's name! Gosh, I'm "slow"! The picture is from the stage musical, too, isn't it? Rolling Eyes

Kat

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Editor Extraordinaire
I'll talk to Elliot but if he hasn't responded to criticism from his dance instructor, who must have warned him he is in danger of being kicked out of the group, it's unlikely he'll listen to me. This just may be one lesson he'll have to learn the hard way.

Kat

David M. Katz

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Marshall
Mark Bench wrote:


P.S. I just "got the joke" connected with the boy's name! Gosh, I'm "slow"!

No, you are NOT slow. You are the only one who got it. Unless others did and just did not acknowledge it.


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Padraig

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Trailboss
David M. Katz wrote: You are the only one who got it. Unless others did and just did not acknowledge it.

Seriously, the movie is burned in my mind forever, Billy has replaced the dragon in my mental conections to the name Eliott.

Maybe it will be a good idea for "my" Eliott to watch the movie and have a talk about afterwards, how much easier it could be for him, if he just...

Jack

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Admin
I think Elliott and I need to sit down and have a long talk about how attitude can effect things. Obviously, if he's about to be expelled from the group, he should be able to see how it would effect him directly. He also needs to understand that, just like in baseball, a team isn't one person, and without good support and back up, no matter how good one person is, they aren't going to win.

I need to get Elliott to think about what he really wants. If he wants competition, we should pull him from the group and find an advanced teacher to work with him. Even then, he needs to understand that blowing his own horn will not go over well with anyone, and that no matter what you do, you depend on a lot of other people.

Depending on how Elliott takes this talk, this might be a good time to talk to him about what he wants from me, and that his mom wants me to help with his discipline, and ask him what he thinks about that and how we should handle it.

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Jack

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Padraig wrote:
David M. Katz wrote: You are the only one who got it. Unless others did and just did not acknowledge it.

Seriously, the movie is burned in my mind forever, Billy has replaced the dragon in my mental conections to the name Eliott.

Maybe it will be a good idea for "my" Eliott to watch the movie and have a talk about afterwards, how much easier it could be for him, if he just...

Henry Thomas will always be 'Elliott' to me, but when it comes to dance, Billy is the man.

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AFinch

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Sherrif
Of course I got it.

BE is one of my favorite films, and ranks in the top five shows I've ever seen.

Pete's Dragon is sadly underrated.

Today's Elliot needs a young Drew Barrymore to set him straight (her slur at the breakfast table would take any 13 year old down several pegs regardless of his ultimate sexuality), and then he needs to be made to watch "The Goodbye Girl" to find out how truly unpleasant another Elliot was before being tamed.

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Guest
I hope this is not an out-of-place intrusion on the purpose of these threads. But, I wanted, first, to commend Dave on the creation of such an interesting and evocative BOTD!

I have been so inspired by it that I have banged out a story--already nearly complete--based on the scenario as described! I did, of course, ask Dave's permission to do so, making sure that he wasn't planning to use it himself for an MMSA story! The story, as has been happening lately, just sort of "wrote itself"--it's somewhat frightening how this is happening. It will be my next "publication," in a few days from now (I don't want to be over-represented on the front page at MMSA!). Please watch for "Elliott Williams: The Discipline of the Dance," coming to a spanking story site near you! There's dancing! There's spanking!

I want to THANK Dave publicly here. I'll also express thanks to the other participants in the thread, and will say here what also appears in the header note with my story: I apologize for the various ways the "Dad" in my story did NOT follow your various pieces of wise parenting advice. Very Happy Embarassed

Guest


Guest
P.S., since we're now mentioning various fictional Elliotts....

From the other side of the spanking, I must mention Chris Meloni's "Elliott Stabler" in "Laws and Order: Special Victims Unit." In the TV show, he is the father of a young boy (who grows to a teen), Dicky (of all the names!). I have often imagined Detective Elliott Stabler giving young Dicky Stabler a firm reminder that crime dose not pay!





The second picture LOOKS like a post-spanking hug, doesn't it? Very Happy



Last edited by Mark Bench on Thu Jul 19, 2012 4:34 pm; edited 1 time in total

Emlyn Morgan

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Trailboss
Looking forward to the story. It's great when a story "writes itself" from some unexpected inspiration: with help from the story-writing ability of the author, of course.

I wouldn't worry about the front page. Post the story when it's ready and leave it to the reviewers to position it.

MemoryMan

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Sherrif
I will discuss the instructors complaints in detail with her (and later with Elliot, also encompassing a talk about the ultimate fate of "big heads")

I will assure her of my full co-operation. I will also suggest to that if my intervention doesn't work that as a first step she shocks him by suspending him for a short period, an action that will have my full support and one that I will reinforce.

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David M. Katz

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Marshall
It doesn't look like he's going to be able to waltz out of this one. Rolling Eyes


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Guest
David M. Katz wrote:It doesn't look like he's going to be able to waltz out of this one. Rolling Eyes

Pas de bourrée ... pas de basque ... pas de bourrée ... pas de bourrée .... pas de bourrée....

And away he goes! Cool

[The story is DONE! I think it's AMAZING ... certainly in the top 5% of anything ever written for MMSA Wink ... it will kill me if it isn't a hit! With the mines closed by Margaret Thatcher, I have only my writing to pay the bills!]

David M. Katz

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Marshall
Mark Bench wrote: I think it's AMAZING ... certainly in the top 5% of anything ever written for MMSA

But are you consistently in the top 95% of all authors on MMSA? We should discuss. Rolling Eyes


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1strappedboy

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Sherrif
Ah yes, that Elliot.

This one needs reigned in with alacrity; I'm much inclined to attempt to give him examples of "how he should be" vis-a-vis a performer and those around him in the hope that I can encourage him to have a bit of humility.

My thought though is that he's full enough of himself that my entreaties will be met with a deaf ear. That being said, I
May let the instructor suspend him. That may be a sufficient shock as to reset him.

If that doesn't do it, I may pull him from this group until he shows some maturity/self awareness.

CHRIS

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Trailboss
AFinch wrote:If I've never been responsible for Elliott's "discipline" before, and we've not talked about it previous, I'm not going to bring down the hammer now.

If he loves dance as much as the scenario indicates, he'd be more devastated but not being able to go dancing anymore. And it sounds, from the scenario, that his behavior is going to cause that with no input from me or his mother.

I'm going to sit down and talk to him. I'm going to tell him what his dance teacher has told me--that he's in danger of being banned from class because of his own actions, and that, unless he no longer wants to go, he'd better straighten up and fly right.

I'm then going to tell him that although there is a song in "Funny Girl" called "I'm the Greatest Star", people who are truly great don't cop attitudes, especially when they are still learning their craft.

Hopefully, I'm going to get through to him. This does not seem to me to be a situation where I can teach him anything about arrogance and attitudes in dealing with peers by punishing him.

Ditto Doc!!!! Smile

Jkher

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Trailboss
David M. Katz wrote:It doesn't look like he's going to be able to waltz out of this one. Rolling Eyes

No dancing around the issue!

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