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BOTD 12/27/12 "You Might As Well Face It, He's Addicted To Games" JB Prod.

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David M. Katz


Marshall
YOU MIGHT AS WELL FACE IT, HE'S ADDICTED TO GAMES

A JohnBoy Production


You have a thirteen year old son, Tiberius. If he needs it, Tiberius is subject to spanking as punishment. Tiberius cannot seem to get away from games. He has a Wii and an X-Box 360 as well as several games for his laptop. If he is not gaming on a system or the computer, he is on his DS or his phone with a game. If friends come over, they play video games. Tiberius does well in school and always gets his homework done. You have even used gaming as an incentive to do well in school. Tiberius has started to pull away from family time and family activities and chooses to play video games instead. Now that there is a break from school for the Holidays, Tiberius seems to be gaming non-stop.

TIBERIUS - 13

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It is time for the annual after Christmas trip to visit your grandmother and your aunts and uncles. The visit is only for a day. You will leave early in the morning, have your visit and return in the evening. You do this every year and Tiberius is aware of it. He typically likes the attention he gets from his great-grandmother and your aunts and uncles.

This year is different, Tiberius wants to stay home. He says he has almost completed a level in the new game he just got for Christmas and wants to finish it and he also says that "hanging out with the old people" is boring. You force the issue and tell Tiberius he has to go as it is a family tradition and it was planned and everyone is looking forward to it. To make sure Tiberius actually spends time with the family, you tell him to also leave his phone and DS at home.

Tiberius in in an awful mood on the car trip there. He is whining and complaining about wanting his games and being bored. His mood is no better upon arrival despite the fact that his great-grandmother and the aunts and uncles are doting on him. He is whiny and even verges on being rude. He remains sullen and withdrawn. You confront him privately and he tells you that he did not want to come see "your lame family" and he is bored and wants to play his games. You tell Tiberius that it is only for a day and the family loves him and enjoys his visits and he needs to stop being rude and withdrawn.

Tiberius does not improve his attitude and, in fact, when he opens his gift from your grandmother (a hand knitted sweater) he tells her he hates it and asks her when she is going to "get a clue" about what kids really like for gifts. Tiberius then announces to all that he hates being there and it is the most boring day of his life. Your grandmother is deeply hurt.

How do you deal with this situation?


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AFinch


Sherrif
I'm going to ask to borrow a private room. Assuming that young Master Kirk has been spanked before in his life, that request is likely to get his attention.

Once in a private room, I'm going to tell JT that he is embarrassing himself, and his mother and me, and that I am deeply ashamed of him. I'm going to remind him of all the things we all do for him, of how much his extended family generally enjoys his company, and how putting aside his games for a little while is a pretty small sacrifice to make for all the indulgence and privilege he generally gets. I will apologize for insisting he leave his phone and DS at home--it would have hurt no one for him to have something to do in the car, but that doesn't make up for his behavior here.

I'm then going to suggest that we go back out and rejoin the group where, if he knows what's good for him, he will apologize to his great grandmother, and at least pretend to be sociable. I'll let him know that it's ok to be bored, but it is NOT OK to be intentionally rude. He's on very low tolerance until we get home--and depending on his behavior the rest of the day, he may have a lot MORE time to be bored and without electronics as well as a desire to play them standing up. I suspect the rest of the day will go well.

Kat


Editor Extraordinaire
I'm sympathetic to Tiberius' feelings about spending time with relatives he doesn't want to see. However, we do have duties to other people and social obligations. If Tiberius is not a completely hopeless case, he already regrets lashing out at his grandmother. I hope a talk will convince him to change his attitude. I won't permit rudeness, but I don't really think punishment or the threat of it has ever wrought a real improvement in attitude, so I will try hard to avoid it.

Kat

John Boy


Sherrif
Hmm this is difficult, he may have been rude to his Grandma yes, but I think the deeper issue is his time spent playing Video Games, I should have been limiting his time, but it looks like it is getting out of hand.

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Stone Man


Marshall
I'll take him to someplace private and talk with him. If he can't snap out of his funk for the rest of the day I shall make hi bottom match the color of his arms and shoulders.

This gaming is out of control. I most do something about it once we are home.

ivor


Marshall
I've been at fault in allowing him to become so obsessed and should have taken steps to break it long before now. I also probably should have done a deal with him and let him play a game in the car on the basis that no games would then take place during the actual visit, but I didn't.

But there is no excuse for the rudeness he has displayed. Scenario doesn't say if I spank but even if I normally don't he has gone too far today, so we're going somewhere private for some 'quality time' together.

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Padraig


Trailboss
Nobody is to blame but me. He is obviously addicted. If you're a smoker try a day without a single cigarette. The effects of the sudden withdrawal are too much to handle for the boy. When we are back, we need counceling asap.

I can try to reason with the boy but I don't think it will help. Nor will a spanking do much good. He might apologise but he will not understand. I have to face my relatives and explain the whole thing. I will have to cope with all the well ment suggestions until we leave early.

Jack


Admin
It's really hard to deal with a situation rationally when you've let it reach a point like this.

The thing to do was, long ago, explain to T that no matter what it is, we have to have a balance in our lives.

In this case, I hope that I'd apologize for T and explain that he's mad at me. I think that I'd point out to him that he's being very rude, remind him that it's not right to take out his frustration with me on every one else, and let him know that he can either make a real attempt to straighten up and be polite, or he can go wait in the car (or somewhere else, if that's too cold).

When we get home, I'm taking all his games, except one - his laptop, if he also uses that for school. He's going to be on severe screen time restriction, and we'll talk about changing some of that when he starts to show more balance and control in his life.

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squarecutter


Sherrif
Never mind electeronic toys Tiberius has caught that dreaded A bug, adolescence. Suddenly our little Emperoror and the rest of his family may as well be on different planets and elecronic games make more sense to him. Still this little green monster is not too old for a reminder about his manners. I hope he will realize he has gone to far when I reach for the nearest earlobe and grasp it tightly between thumb and forefinger. I will ask our hosts for a private room where I will deliver a short sharp handspanking This will be followed by a slightly longer lecture where I will insist on a gracious apology to the assembled company when he has had time to calm down. He will also be warned that things can get a whole lot warmer for his seat when we get home if he doesn't shape up.

I then think we do have to start rationing the lads game time as it could become unhealthy, He needs space but he still needs parenting

MemoryMan


Sherrif
I don't feel like coming down too hard since I feel I've cack handedly made a significant contribution to the situation.

The background scenario tells me that Tiberius is a sensible young teen who is perfectly capable of keeping his gaming passion from impacting on his day to day "work" life but has allowed it engulf his leisure time. I should have been supervising this, encouraging other interests and if necessary imposing time limits to prevent it becoming an addiction.

Instead I have done nothing and today's situation is to a large extent of my own making. For a thirteen year old being the only child in a throng of doting oldies is going to be a daunting experience in spite of whatever Christmas goodies come his way. He is a sensible kid I should have simply reminded him of family obligations and symathetically persuaded him to come along instead of playing the heavy and forcing him. Also I certainly should not have barred him from bringing a game along to occupy himself in the car and during the periods he is alone, sitting around on the outside of adult conversations.

I'm going to send Tiberius out of the room and apologise to the assembled company for his antsy behaviour and my role in provoking it by barring him from bringing anything along to occupy himself. Next he and I will be having the private discussion we should have had before leaving; during which I will acknowledge and apologise for my mistakes. Embarassed

Hopefully he will respond positively, lose his resentment and start to behave normally. Should he remain intransigent the talk will necessarily move on to the rules of politeness and good manners with a reminder that he will be losing his trousers when we get home. What follows then will depend on how deep a hole he continues to dig.

PS(Ti's so spankable I do hope he remains intransigent) Twisted Evil



Last edited by MemoryMan on Thu Dec 27, 2012 9:33 am; edited 1 time in total

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David M. Katz


Marshall
MemoryMan wrote:I don't feel like coming down too hard since I feel I've cack handedly made a significant contribution to the situation.

The background scenario tells me that Tiberius is a sensible young teen who is perfectly capable of keeping his gaming passion from impacting on his day to day "work" life but has allowed it engulf his leisure time. I should have been supervising this, encouraging other interests and if necessary imposing time limits to prevent it becoming an addiction.

Instead I have done nothing and today's situation is to a large extent of my own making. For a thirteen year old being the only child in a throng of doting oldies is going to be a daunting experience in spite of whatever Christmas goodies come his way. He is a sensible kid I should have simply reminded him of family obligations and symathetically persuaded him to come along instead of playing the heavy and forcing him. Also I certainly should not have barred him from bringing a game along to occupy himself in the car and during the periods he is alone, sitting around on the outside of adult conversations.

I'm going to send Tiberius out of the room and apologise to the assembled company for his antsy behaviour and my role in provoking it. Next he and I will be having the private discussion we should have had before leaving; during which I will acknowledge and apologise for my mistakes. Embarassed

Hopefully he will respond positively, lose his resentment and start to behave normally. Should he remain intransigent the talk will necessarily move on to the rules of politeness and good manners with a reminder that he will be losing his trousers when we get home. What follows then will depend on how deep a hole he continues to dig.

PS(Ti's so spankable I do hope he remains intransigent) Twisted Evil

I totally agree with everything MM has said! I am stealing his answer.

MemoryMan wrote:

PS(Ti's so spankable I do hope he remains intransigent) Twisted Evil

And I do mean EVERYTHING MM said!


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Stone Man


Marshall
MemoryMan wrote:PS(Ti's so spankable I do hope he remains intransigent) Twisted Evil

Spank him once every day and call it preventative medicine. Razz

More if he really needs them. Twisted Evil

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