Bransom, TX

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3 June 2013 - How Many Times Do I Have To Tell You?

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Your home is full of boys, and you often have their friends staying with you. You're one of the top destinations when other families need a place for a boy to stay for a day or several.

Over the past year, you've become close with the boys from the Cave family

Adam - 10, Blain - 15, and Colm - 12
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The Cave's are leaving on vacation with their parents this morning. The night before, they stayed with you, so their parents could have a date night.

Recently, Blain has lived with you for a few weeks, after some major trouble with his mom. While she constantly complains about his attitude and how hard he is to motivate, you haven't had a lot of trouble with him (though you have used CP upon him in a couple of instances).

His little brothers have never lived with you, but they've both been frequent visitors, and both of them have also been over your lap in the time you've known them.

While you're not as strict with other boys as you are with your own, one of your iron clad rules is that people need to clean up after themselves. With Blain, it only took a couple of warnings to get through to him. Colm has had a bit more trouble, but your boys who are his age are pretty conscientious about it, so he's done a pretty good job. Not so much with Adam, and you've had to give him regular warnings - it seems like almost every time he overnights with you.

This time, as soon as they'd arrived, you gave Colm and Adam warnings about remembering to clean up after themselves. That evening, as you're checking on everyone, you find a big mess in the kitchen - cabinets open, milk slopped onto the counter, and the chocolate mix sitting next to the mess, with a dirty spoon in the sink.

It's not hard to tell who left it, since you quickly find Adam, in his friends' bedroom, drinking chocolate milk.

Do you have a question for him?

Last edited by Jack on Mon Jun 03, 2013 2:12 pm; edited 1 time in total

David M. Katz

Yes. I actually have more than one question.

I will ask Adam if he forgot to do something. I will ask Adam if he remembers our talk about cleaning up after ourselves. I also think I need to ask Adam if he knows how to clean up.I will ask Adam what he thinks we should do about this problem.

I will then escort him back to the kitchen and I will supervise him while he cleans up his mess and show him exactly what my expectations are. I have told but I am not sure I have shown. After the mess is cleaned I will send him on his way with a couple of stingors with the promise of a "real" spanking if the problem occurs again.

Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.


I'm not sure here. Despite the verbal warnings, has he beenn physically shown what's expected in terms of neatness/cleanliness? If he's been told and shown what I expects then I'll proceed differently.

Presuming he still doesn't get regarding expectations, I will supervise a clean up by him so I know he understands the standard. Future shortfalls will be met with a sore rear.

If he already knows what expectations are, I have no crisis wit proceeding to a sore rear first followed by supervised clean up.


I agree he needs to be shown, and supervised, and encouraged with some stingoers bordering on proper smacks and his attitud had better be right too or Adam will be over my knee. Hopefully the rhetorical 'do your folks let you do this?' question will help make the point but may be not if this is about the family I'm thinking of!


Editor Extraordinaire
I can't really view the mess as a "big" mess. I expect the problem is that he is accustomed to someone else picking up after him. Kids living away from home for the first time often have to be told repeatedly, "Your mother isn't here to pick up after you."

Before reacting, I'd ask myself if I consider the boys guests. If I do, then I'd ask myself how I would react if an adult guest were guilty of similar inconsiderateness. The answer to that would depend on how long I'm stuck with the person -- I mean how long I'm enjoying his company. If I consider a person an obnoxious guest, I probably would content myself with not inviting him again rather than having an uncomfortable confrontation.

In this case, I can't see that spanking a kid would serve much purpose. I'd probably take him to the kitchen, point out what needs to be tidied up and put away; then I'd gently tell him that with so many people living in a house, everyone has to pitch in, at least to the extent of picking up after himself -- and if he can't do that, I can't continue having him as a guest.



It doesn't strike me as a mega disaster.

I'll tell Adam to come with me nowshow him the mess and instruct him to clean it up to my satisfaction. Then I'll remind him (again) that is how I expect to see things in future.

If his Mom lets him get away with this at home then I have to accept it is going to be hard for the kid to adapt immediately to my ways.

Stone Man

If I haven't already, I need to help/show Adam how to clean things up to the level I expect. If this is the case then this will be the last warning (but not the last hinting) before he can expect a sore bottom.

I do like the "threat" suggested by Kat about Adam not being allowed to return if he can't learn to take care of things for himself. That could be MAJOR motivation.

Twisted Evil Unlike some here, I'm sorely (Isn't that a great word?) lacking in boys to spank and would gladly give all three boys a good boy spanking and then go and clean up the mess myself. Razz


I'm amazed Boysmack hasn't put in an appearance today. This trio are prime candidates for him Laughing

John Boy

I ask him about the mess, and about my very clear warning. Then remind him what happens to boys who can't follow the rules and clean up after themselves. He will be cleaning the kitchen and show everyone why you should remember to clean. EmbarassedEmbarassed Sore Bare Butt Kitchen Clean up time.


1strappedboy wrote:I'm not sure here. Despite the verbal warnings, has he beenn physically shown what's expected in terms of neatness/cleanliness? If he's been told and shown what I expects then I'll proceed differently.

I'm not sure it's really possible to show a boy how to 'clean up after himself'. If we were just talking about a snack - no problem. However, this rule is supposed to apply to everything from coming in from the rain to using the bathroom, to the pool, to... snacks.

My basic explanation is that an area should look the same when you leave as when you entered. Of course, I don't really expect that from 10 year olds (or even teens on all occasions). It basically comes down to, if you use something, and it's still usable (say, chocolate sauce), put it back where it goes. If it's dirty or destroyed, put clean it, then put it away, put it where it waits to be clean, or put it in the trash. If you have any questions - ask.

Square, you're pretty obviously correct about the family you think this is, and I think that's part of the problem. Some boys have no trouble doing this, even if they don't do it correctly (forget to rehang the wet dish cloth or wipe the counter or something), but others just can't seem to remember to do it, and 'Adam' falls into that category.

Kat has a point about how you see the boy, but I don't use the same system he does. If an adult in my home would get up and fix his own snack, that person would be expected to clean up after himself. If it bothers me that he fixed (that means 'prepared' in Texican) his own snack, rather than asking me, then he probably won't be invited back, but I do have a number of adult friends who are treated like, and expected to behave like, family.

In this case, 'Adam' got himself a good smack (after removing milk from hand) and was reminded about the rule. He apologized, and I did show him each step of what needed to be done, then explained why we do it this way - so I basically agree with pretty much all of you.


I kind of figured this was one of Carrie's kids you are 'characterizing' here and that's why I went off onto the has he been shown expectations tangent as I rather surmised that he had not.

I won't punish for anything done in true ignorance, as in lack of knowledge, but if he's just being lazy or he knows what the expected norms are and has deliberately disregarded them, then I'll be fixing to (preparing to) whop him!

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