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BOTD 9/18/13 "A Whale Of Trouble" A Late Chat Production

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David M. Katz


Marshall
A WHALE OF TROUBLE
A Late Chat Production

Your eleven year old son, Jonah, is very restless in church and starts being disruptive to the service.  You try a couple of times to get him redirected and calmed down but he is becoming disruptive to the point of disturbing others.  The service is close to being finished so you quietly tell Jonah to go outside and just wait on the front steps of the church.  Jonah eagerly gets up and leaves.

However he quickly bores of sitting on the steps and remembers he has a football in the car.  He goes to the car and gets his football.  He starts by throwing  it up in the air and catching it.  Jonah then throws the football and runs after it.  Finally Jonah decides to kick his football and run after it.  He is now very close to the church building.


JONAH - 11
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Jonah makes a spectacular drop kick but right as the minister is closing the service . . .CRASH!  The new memorial stained glass window is broken.  Jonah kicked his football right through the window.  Everyone runs outside and there is Jonah staring at the broken window.  Everyone then starts looking at you wondering what you are going to do.

Does Jonah face a fate of Biblical proportions?


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AFinch


Sherrif
He's 11, not three. He should be able to sit through a normal service with only minimal fidgeting.

He was told to "just go sit on the steps". Not to get a football and play. Not sure how he got into the car to get said football, since I'd have locked my car.

He should have the good sense not to kick a ball in the direction of the building. Still, the window is an accident. And therefore, to me, a red herring.

Jonah's getting a spanking, but it won't be of Biblical Proportions. The stained glass window (which I will have to pay to replace) was accidentally broken. He's getting punished for being unable to behave in church, and for disobeying when he was sent to sit on the steps.

Jack


Admin
I'm honestly pretty torn on this. An 11-year old should be able to sit through a service without becoming that disruptive. If there was a real problem, I should probably have left with him, so I'm guessing this isn't regular behavior (and that we are regular church goers. At his age, he should know the virtues of obedience, and the risks he takes when he goes beyond what he's told. I should have locked the car. He knows not to throw/kick his ball around buildings for exactly this reason.

I think Jonah will be getting spanked, because he shouldn't have gone to the car after being told to wait on the steps, he should have been able to control himself, but mainly because he knows not to play ball around buildings.

And now I have to talk to the preacher about how much that window costs.


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1strappedboy


Sherrif
The law of unintended consequences.  This is one of those "I know you didn't mean THIS to happen but you should have been aware and are therefore CERTAINLY about to get spanked!

Assuming there isn't some psycho/medical reason that renders him unable to be quiet for a few minutes, this is pure brattiness.  Jonah is getting a good one; it just won't be in front of an audience and he should thank heaven (and the management thereof) for that!



Last edited by 1strappedboy on Wed Sep 18, 2013 9:25 am; edited 1 time in total

John Boy


Sherrif
I told him a specific spot to be, he disobeyed. He knows he shouldn't kick a ball that close to buildings, and he knows what either of those violations would mean, let alone both EmbarassedEmbarassed

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kalico


Sherrif
Ditto Y'all so far.....






hugs kal

squarecutter


Sherrif
Three things an 11 year old should know or could do better

1 Church is a time for sitting quiet and showing respect. Jonah is 11 not 3 and he either has advanced adhd or he is a very spoilt brat if he can't manage that

2 Having gained his partial victory he Disobeys me again( the first time was while he was in church) going to my car and fetching a ball to play with when he

was supposed to sit on the step

3 Dimitri is right on the Law of unintendend consquences. I don't think much slack is going to be cut here because he wasn't meat to have a ball anyway..

And a drop kick straight at the church? with enough force to shatter a stained glass window What was he thinking? How often does he aim aim a drop kick

straight at our house. Again at 11 he surely knows better or was this more contempt for the church



Jonahs contempt, for me and the Church, possibly more the latter has landed him in huge trouble. That window could cost him his entire childhood pocket

money , his college fund and his university loan in one go but no doubt at 11 he knows it will be me who picks up that tab as the responsible adult.


I will tell Jonah I am deeply ashamed at his behaviour. Having seen that other discussion I am going to do that thing you cant do to adults, Jonahs backside

is going to pay big time. Dimitri, can I borrow that strop. Assuming this isn't one of those churches where the kid gets it in front of the congregation we will

do this at home though I might consider inviting the Minister to make sure I don't go overboard/see justice was done. You takes your pick





ivor


Marshall
I expect all the congregation have heard of the 'wailing wall'. Now they are about to be introduced to the 'wailing window', or perhaps more accurately the wailing Jonah who definitely won't be able to sit still when I've finished with him!

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Jack


Admin
squarecutter wrote:Jonah is 11 not 3 and he either has advanced adhd or he is a very spoilt brat if he can't manage that
I'm going to disagree with this one thing. There are times, for various reasons, when sitting still is a misery. That's true for me, but I've learned to just suck it up and get through it. That's much harder for a child. who's still learning to examine and deal with what his body and psyche might unexpectedly drop on him. I'd say that, if this isn't regular behavior, it could very easily be neither of these things.

(And let's face it, if it was dad who was really antsy and uncomfortable, how many of you think the family would be at church today?).

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squarecutter


Sherrif
Jack wrote:
squarecutter wrote:Jonah is 11 not 3 and he either has advanced adhd or he is a very spoilt brat if he can't manage that
I'm going to disagree with this one thing.  There are times, for various reasons, when sitting still is a misery.  That's true for me, but I've learned to just suck it up and get through it.  That's much harder for a child. who's still learning to examine and deal with what his body and psyche might unexpectedly drop on him.  I'd say that, if this isn't regular behavior, it could very easily be neither of these things.

(And let's face it, if it was dad who was really antsy and uncomfortable, how many of you think the family would be at church today?).
I'm sure one can be antsy without being disruptive. May be just 'sitting still' wasn't the best term to use but its what would get tersely whispered to me in

church if I got fidgety. Happily I'm not from the bible belt so this wasn't that often

Stone Man


Marshall
Do we know why Jonah is so fidgety? Per chance has he already had his hide tanned this morning and can't get even a little comfortable sitting on a hard wooden pew?

Kat


Editor Extraordinaire
I remember sitting through some Protestant services that seemed to go on forever, so I don't necessarily agree that an 11 year old should be able to sit quietly through a service -- it just depends on the church and how long winded the preaching is, how many choruses of "Amen" come from the congregation, how many hymns are sung, etc.

However, Jonah should certainly know better than to dropkick a football towards the church. He is getting a spanking.

Surely the church has this wonderful stuff called insurance that covers accidents? If there is any percentage of the repairs that are not covered, of course, I will pay.

Kat

ivor


Marshall
Kat wrote:I remember sitting through some Protestant services that seemed to go on forever, so I don't necessarily agree that an 11 year old should be able to sit quietly through a service -- it just depends on the church and how long winded the preaching is, how many choruses of "Amen" come from the congregation, how many hymns are sung, etc.

However, Jonah should certainly know better than to dropkick a football towards the church. He is getting a spanking.

Surely the church has this wonderful stuff called insurance that covers accidents? If there is any percentage of the repairs that are not covered, of course, I will pay.

Kat
But does the insurance cover "Acts of God"? Laughing 

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Kat


Editor Extraordinaire
ivor wrote:But does the insurance cover "Acts of God"? Laughing 
I sure hope so!

Kat

1strappedboy


Sherrif
Stone Man wrote:Do we know why Jonah is so fidgety? Per chance has he already had his hide tanned this morning and can't get even a little comfortable sitting on a hard wooden pew?
If it was because of that, he's about to be a lot more fidgety!  

Seriously, I can understand a bit of boredom/distraction as an 11 year old in church.  I remember the times I'd find myself at the grands' church on the occasional Sunday.  Let me just say that, compared to the level of involvement a worshiper must have in an Orthodox Liturgy, Presbyterian Sunday services bored me to death!!!!

I also knew that I was expected to sit attentively, if not perfectly still and 11 year old Van and 10 year old Mik were capable of doing so, even if we DID have strong 'motivation'. Even Helen and Nettie, at 7 and 4 were behaved!

I agree with Kat.  I'm sure insurance will cover the monetary loss though I'll end up eating their deductible.  That too shall be extracted from Jonah's hide.



Last edited by 1strappedboy on Wed Sep 18, 2013 9:27 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : skipped a word)

1strappedboy


Sherrif
Kat wrote:
ivor wrote:But does the insurance cover "Acts of God"? Laughing 
I sure hope so!

Kat
God had little to do with this!!

I'll let Jonah say it: "the devil made me do it"!!Razz 

David M. Katz


Marshall
Maybe I will just throw him into the sea and let God sort it out?

OK, yes, a spanking but for not being where he was told and for playing ball near the building. Biblical proportions, not quite,  but there will be weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth.

Like Kat said, I am sure there is insurance but I will gladly cover any deductible or miscellaneous expenses and will charge Jonah's allowance a token "fine" for a while to "recover the cost."


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Pi Beta


Deputy
If this were at a Wee Free service in the wilds of Scotland with one of their (in)famous 3 hour long fire and brimstone sermons to which I've been dragged by my wife, I'll forgive him. However, I can't imagine a Wee Free chapel with any stained glass - I'm sure it would be considered heretical, so I have to assume it's a more mainstream church.

I think he'll choose to eat his Sunday lunch in a standing position - and probably the evening meal as well!

John Boy


Sherrif
Jack wrote:
squarecutter wrote:Jonah is 11 not 3 and he either has advanced adhd or he is a very spoilt brat if he can't manage that
 There are times, for various reasons, when sitting still is a misery.  
(And let's face it, if it was dad who was really antsy and uncomfortable, how many of you think the family would be at church today?).
a little off topic, well think about some of us, who volunteer and have heard it three or four times a week. Razz By age 11 at our Church, he would have been with the Kids Ministry or the Junior High group. The leaders in the Junior High group, do a good job at keeping them behaved (Don't ask me how) during service. Then again that is the 11AM at 9 AM they just sit around and do kinda a meet and greet along with the High School and College Ministry in one of our little sitting areas. But I digress LOL

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