Now Mike is 15 and Matt is 16, and you don't spank anymore. You've found that various restrictions, short groundings, and extra chores seems to work great with both of them. You take their feedback when deciding consequences, so they're usually okay with it.. Or at least don't gripe too much. And the one exception to not using corporal punishment anymore is that if they violate the terms of their punishment, they get a sore butt added to it.
Right now, your brother and sister-in-law are out of town, so Matt is staying with you, as much for fun and company as necessity. Last night, the two boys went out to hang with some friends and see a movie. It was after curfew when they called you to say they were out of gas and money.
You were not happy, but you got your gas can, went to fill it up, followed them to the gas station, filled the car, and followed them home. They'd violated curfew, as well as breaking rules about filling the gas tank when they borrow the car, so they know they're in trouble. However, they have tickets to a big concert tonight. They pleaded and begged and managed to convince you to ground them for the day, and give them some extra chores to pay the money back. You agreed, locked up their electronics, set some chores for them, and stressed that they were to stay in their room until you got home and checked the chores.
You managed to leave work a bit early, and when you got home, you surprised the two boys:
The boys did finish all the chores you set, plus their regular ones. They didn't go anywhere, or have over company, or use their electronics, but it was just such a beautiful day outside that they.... did some yard work on top of everything else!?!
The boys didn't even think about breaking the rules until you, obviously upset, started questioning them. Are you breaking your agreement? Breaking their butts? Accepting what they did and thanking them? Or maybe asking more questions?
- If You Ask More Questions:
- If you ask, the boys admit that they did stay out back after they finished the yard work. It was really a beautiful day.