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BOTD 12/30/14 "A Picture Too Far?" A mahoover Production

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David M. Katz


Marshall
A PICTURE TOO FAR?
A mahoover Production

You have two sons, Mike (16) and John (13).  You live in a small house, and the boys share a room.  Recently, the boys have not been getting along with each other very well.  There have been several minor tussles that you have let slip by, since the boys seemed to work things out after.  You have talked to them together and separately, and the problem seems to be lack of privacy.  You would like to give the boys separate rooms, but there just isn't space in the house.  Today John comes running into the house and slams the door to his room.  A few minutes later, Mike and his friend Caleb (16) come into the house laughing.  When you ask them what is going on, they tell you John wouldn't leave them alone.  So they pantsed him and then stuffed him in a cooler.  And it was so funny, they took a picture with Mike's phone, then posted it on Instagram.


Mike - 16
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Caleb - 16
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John - 13
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Caleb is a frequent guest at your house, and you and his parents have mutual spanking permission for all of the boys.  In the past, when the boys have gotten in trouble together, they have been spanked together by whichever parent found out about it first.

What do you do next?


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Pi Beta


Deputy
This has definitely gone too far. I don't think corporal punishment, per se, is going to help the situation - whether hand, brush, belt, paddle, tawse or cane. However, I'm going to tell them to bare themselves and get in position, at which time I'll take a photograph and tell them that it will be posted on line unless they remove the offending photograph that instant, delete it form the memory and make a fullsome apology to John for their over-reaction. Any actual spanking will, I'm sure, only exacerbate the problem between the brothers.

John may need some prompting, but I hope he will then apologise for his failure to give them some space, after which we need to reconsider ways to reconfigure the living accommodation to give each his own space. If necessary, maybe Mike could stay with Caleb for a couple of days while the situation cools.

db105


Trailboss
scratch and they tell me what they did just like that, laughingly? Don't they know how I feel about bullying?

They are going to hear a harsh lecture. I understand their need to get some space, but if John is bugging them they need to talk to me. What they did is bullying, and posting the picture online only makes it a thousand times worse. I'll ask them if they'd like me to take pictures of the whipping they are going to get and post them online. They are going to remove the picture immediately. Then they are going to get that whipping. Then I'll have them apologize to John and, if he actually did bug them excessively, I'll also have John apologize to them.

I'll talk to my boys and explain again why it is not possible to get separate rooms for them, even though I understand their wanting more privacy. I'll offer to string a curtain along the center of the room, so that when it’s pulled shut there’s actually a separate (and private) area for each boy.

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squarecutter


Sherrif
Think spanking for this is a cop out. This time I am sending Caleb home with a note for his Dad and he will not be allowed to return for 3 days. Nor will Mike be allowed to visit Caleb. I will also be suspending the instagram, facebook, You Tube etc accounts for the same period while deleting this particular picture. I don't suppose John was entirely innocent so we will be having a chat about that as well

Stone Man


Marshall
I'm sending Caleb home and calling his parents to make them aware of what has happened. I'll let them know how I plan to handle things and they can make up their own minds. Cal will not be allowed over here (or Mike over there) until I fell the matter settled between the boys.

I will talk with Mike and John separately and together to try my best to figure out what is happening. Mike has come across as a bully and John as a pest to this point. Apologies need to be made, and meant. The picture of John needs to be purged. Both boys can ready themselves for a whuppin'. Whether they get one or not is up to their actions as they relate to this incident.

ivor


Marshall
Pi's answer appears to provide the best direct answer to the problem that has arisen.

The solution to the shared bedroom is another matter. scratch Perhaps I can ask Caleb's parents if Mike can move in with them, at least on a temporary basis.

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Jack


Admin
Methinks the room is a red herring in this case. This is about a little brother wanting attention and being needy (read: pest), and about bullying and public humiliation that's completely unacceptable.

If I've always treated Caleb like one of my own, then he's going to get the same thing Mike is about to get. If he doesn't want to accept that, I'll call his father. If I know his Dad, Cal will be better off taking it from me, because his dad will agree to whatever I set, and then add something for his disobedience and disrespect.

The older boys have proven they don't know the difference between a joke and bullying, so they're losing their phones, and I'll tell them I should probably delete all their social media accounts, until they prove they're responsible enough to handle them. Then, with John watching, the Mike (and Cal) are going to bare themselves and take position for a long, slow paddling with the medium Lexan. Considering how they look, I'll bet they can take six to eight without it being too harsh.

Depending on recent behavior, I might take my phone out, set it up, and tell them I'm recording it, if they really want something to post on social media.

I'm only keeping the phones a day or two, and I won't delete the social media accounts (or actually record the paddlings), but I am going to point out that, John is younger than him, and he's going to show the behavior they model for him - and that if they want respect, they did the exact opposite of what they should have).


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Emlyn Morgan


Trailboss
I'm going to whack them.

mahoover


Cowboy
I pretty much agree with Jack, but don't see John as completely innocent. I would also confiscate the older boys phones, and let John witness them being paddled. However, after they have been paddled, I would let them know that if John is bothering them, they can tell him to give them some space. And if he doesn't, they can tell me and I will handle it from there. And I would let John know that once he has been asked to give the older boys space, he needs to back off, or else it is his butt that is at risk.

I will also try to spend some one on one time with both boys, separately.

mahoover


Cowboy
One other thing I meant to mention, but didn't. Sad The picture of John in the scenario is what the boys posted. I don't see the contents of the picture making things worse, or that it immediately has to come down. They were still bullying, but they didn't post an illegal picture, or one that could cause other problems.

Iconoclast


Trailboss
Pi Beta wrote:This has definitely gone too far. I don't think corporal punishment, per se, is going to help the situation - whether hand, brush, belt, paddle, tawse or cane. However, I'm going to tell them to bare themselves and get in position, at which time I'll take a photograph and tell them that it will be posted on line unless they remove the offending photograph that instant, delete it form the memory and make a fullsome apology to John for their over-reaction. Any actual spanking will, I'm sure, only exacerbate the problem between the brothers.

John may need some prompting, but I hope he will then apologise for his failure to give them some space, after which we need to reconsider ways to reconfigure the living accommodation to give each his own space. If necessary, maybe Mike could stay with Caleb for a couple of days while the situation cools.

I mostly agree with Pi except there is really no way to retrieve any photo from the internet! Therefore I will proceed as Pi suggests except that when the boys are in position I will have John slip in and take a picture, which he will also post to Instagram while I talk to the boys. The last thing I will mention to them is that:

TURNABOUT IS ALWAYS FAIR!!

Iconoclast

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