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BOTD 5/2/15 "In Dad's Footsteps" A Memory Man Production

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David M. Katz

A Memory Man Production

Your widowed father is in poor health and is in need of care.  Your home is not big enough to accommodate him and you make the big decision to sell up and return with your spouse and 13yo son Trevor to the much larger childhood home you expect to inherit and which fortunately is within commuting distance of your work.  

The change has the most effect on Trevor because it meant him changing schools and making new friends but he doesn't really mind because he dotes on his grandpa.  Trevor is generally well behaved and although you have a good relationship with him he is independently minded and from time to time shows a rebellious streak which earns him a spanking. Once he became a teen, and a somewhat mouthy one at that, his spankings have been augmented by applications of your belt.  Since you moved over a month ago Trevor has settled, mucked in and been very helpful, also his presence seems to have reinvigorated your dad.

Winter is approaching and although the house is centrally heated it has a featured stone fireplace that gives out a cheerful friendly warmth whenever you choose to light it in the coldest months.  You have ordered in a load of logs and Trevor is helping you to split them and stack them in the woodshed when he notices a cobweb encrusted strap hanging on the wall.

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"What's this for?" He asks lifting it down.

"That WAS for my butt when your grandpa brought me out here for a hiding"

"Wow! Did you really get taken out to the woodshed for an old fashioned strapping from this, I bet that REALLY hurt" he exclaimed slashing the strap down across the saw horse.

"It sure did, and that's where I got it, bending across that."  You smiled. "You can drop your pants and try it if you like"  
"Thanks Dad, but I think I'll pass."

Trevor though gave you quite a funny look when you mused "You are getting a bit old to be dropping your pants in front of your mother, perhaps I should start bringing you out here for your hidings.  

Trevor had started flouting his general curfew, not by much, but since he is still making new friends you have given him some leeway although you did warn him, only part seriously, each time he came in late that he could be heading for the woodshed if he didn't start to follow the rules.

When he slipped back to stretch your indulgence further you decided enough was enough and one night took him seriously to task about it and put him on a last warning.  The dressing down you gave him didn't sit well with him and he started running his mouth.  An angry exchange was developing when he suddenly broke it off and started to walk away.

You called "Where do you think you are going?"

"To the bloody woodshed; where do you think?" He calls back over his shoulder.

Do you follow him?  ..........and will that old strap perhaps be shedding its remaining cobwebs?

Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.


No, I'm not using a strap that's been out there long enough to get cobwebby on my son. I'll use my belt this time, and tomorrow I'll buy some leather cleaner and restorer, and he can put some elbow grease into getting it ready for the next time he wants to mouth off.

BTW - doesn't he have his own bedroom to which I could have taken him?

"In the end, it's just a story. But if you ask me, it's all true."

David M. Katz


Very Happy

Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.


Agree with Jack. The woodshed is a good private place, but the strap needs some saddle soap and leather oil. At least your son understands what all this is about.

Y Lee Coyote

I'll suggest that Trevor is sending a different message than "OK, use that strap."  Namely that your dressing down had become counter productive and -- to him -- you were running [off] your mouth.  Whether or not he agrees that he misbehaved he is saying -- "Shut the f*ck up and use the strap." without actually mouthing off.

I think that this needs to be addressed before anything else is said or done.




YLC makes a good point.

I also have to agree that the strap needs to be put into good working order before it can be used so I would use the belt this time and then Trevor can spend sometime over the weekend lavishing on it the care it needs.


ivor wrote:YLC makes a good point.

Sometimes I do what YL did here, and sometimes I try to answer them strictly as the parent presented in scenario.

While I sometimes have trouble in going overboard in a 'dressing down' (I used to be really bad about it, but Mikell broke me of most of that long ago), what really bothers me is that the father in this scenario has been inconsistent, and then he suddenly decides enough is enough. If you're not going to enforce your own rules, how can you expect a kid to know that it's wrong for him to break the rule this time, or that you feel he's taking advantage of your 'indulgence'?

The real thing to do in this scenario would have been to just say, "Hey, Bud. You need to get back to strictly obeying that curfew, unless you want to test out that old strap. Here's some saddle soap and oil, why don't you go clean it up and think about it."

"In the end, it's just a story. But if you ask me, it's all true."

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