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11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around!

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1 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Sun May 10, 2015 5:01 pm

Jack


Admin
Last Thursday, your 16-year old son, Bryce, got in some pretty serious trouble, that included having his rear end worn out and being grounded from driving.  You're figuring it will be until after school Friday, but you haven't announced that yet.

This morning, there's not much going on.  It's Mother's Day, and you hosted a fancy brunch for the mothers in your life, but there were thunderstorms all morning, so the kids are mostly lazing around.

One thing about Bryce is that he tends to be harder on himself than you do (which is saying something).  While you tend to spank and forgive, he takes a while to forgive himself, when he knows he's really messed up.  That's turned him into one of your best behaved boys, but it also makes you feel bad.

After brunches, you decide to run to the store, and you decide to take Bryce with you.  It's not great driving weather, but you want him to understand that you're not upset with him.  

The only problem is, you can't find him.  You look around and finally call his phone, but he doesn't even answer.  You decide to go without him, but when you go get the keys, you notice the spare keys for your Jaguar is gone.

Now, you love your kids, but...


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Full of apprehension and dread, you walk out to the garage.  Sure enough, Bryce has taken the keys to the car.

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He smiles when he sees you, even though you've caught him in the act...

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"Hey, Dad.  I was going to wash it, too, but..."

He gestures over his shoulder, to the rainy weather.

You look inside, and he's just putting the finishing touches on a full detail, including cleaning under the seats, conditioning the leather, and vacuuming.  Normally you pay about $80 to get that done professionally, about once a quarter.  From what you can tell, he's done as good a job as the professionals normally do.

"I got Josh to take me to the auto parts, so I could get some stuff.  I used that new car smell stuff you like."

He stops and takes a deep breath.

"I know I screwed up the other day, Dad.  I really am sorry you had to whup me, but I wanted you to know I know I screwed up."

Is it time to remind him he wasn't supposed to be touching car keys this week, or time to let him?


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2 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Sun May 10, 2015 5:09 pm

David M. Katz


Marshall
He gets a pass.

The intent of the restriction was to punish him by keeping something he wanted to do from him. This hardly classifies as something in that category.

The next question I have for myself is do I accept his penance or do I hand him 80 bucks?


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3 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Sun May 10, 2015 5:21 pm

kalico


Sherrif
What Katz said.....

4 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Sun May 10, 2015 7:14 pm

LLALVA


Trailboss
Thank him for the good job.
Keep up with your original plan to take him with you to the grocery store.
You two can get some ice cream.

I love you Bryce

Hugs

Leti

5 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Sun May 10, 2015 8:30 pm

AFinch


Sherrif
I guess that's how Bryce got to be one of "Skater's good boys".

He's already been whupped for his earlier transgression. He knows he screwed up and deserved it. He's accepted that, and without being asked, detailed the Jag.

I'm not sure I can see anything to be gained by keeping his keys for the week. I'm going to give them back.

6 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Sun May 10, 2015 9:48 pm

Stone Man


Marshall
I like Leti's way of handling things.

7 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Mon May 11, 2015 12:52 am

MemoryMan


Sherrif
I'll thank Bryce

I'll praise the quality of his work.

..............and if I'm so hidebound by my rules that I think -in the circumstances- that the taking the keys is an issue then I don't deserve to have Bryce as my son.

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8 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Mon May 11, 2015 1:20 am

ivor


Marshall
It appears you banned him from driving not from valeting. He evidently holds no resentment for the punishment you imposed so this is not the time for you to raise the issue - or the stakes - again.



Last edited by ivor on Mon May 11, 2015 8:36 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Keyboard problems.......)

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9 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Mon May 11, 2015 8:28 am

squarecutter


Sherrif
I think the taking ofthe keys is symbolic. Its the ban from driving that matter. I will accept this in he spirit it is meant Without telling Bryce yet as I don't want him feeling any more guilts he may have shortened his grounding but I want to get the balance right and time as well as Labour and spanking need to be part of the penance

10 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Mon May 11, 2015 1:45 pm

Emlyn Morgan


Trailboss
Weren't they beautiful? - the Jaguar E-type. Especially this first model. I worked in the Jaguar factory in Browns Lane Coventry for a while around 1978 - during my 46 years in the industry. Jaguar Cars was founded by William Lyons from Blackpool - now owned by the Indian company Tata along with Land Rover. They're doing rather well at present. Paying my pension anyway!

Anyway, I'm going to whack the boy.

11 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Mon May 11, 2015 3:00 pm

Jack


Admin
MemoryMan wrote:I'll thank Bryce

I'll praise the quality of his work.

..............and if I'm so hidebound by my rules that I think -in the circumstances- that the taking the keys is an issue then I don't deserve to have Bryce as my son.

squarecutter wrote:I think the taking ofthe keys is symbolic. Its the ban from driving that matter. I will accept this in he spirit it is meant Without telling Bryce yet as I don't want him feeling any more guilts he may have shortened his grounding but I want to get the balance right and time as well as Labour and spanking need to be part of the penance

Actually, 'taking the keys' was purely something I added to complete the BOTD. The keys for the Van and SUV hang where they are, just in case someone needs to use on of them, and I can't get home. There's actually no reason the keys to the Jag or Lexus are there as well, except that I tend to be a creature of habit.

When I was a kid, not only did my mom and step-dad have to hide their keys, but there was a period of time when they had to take the distributor wires out of the cars and sleep with them under their mattress. When Satana was 13 years old, she got in trouble (received a lecture for bringing home a report card where her high grade was a 'C'... in gym! How do you make a 'C' in gym? Keep in mind that a few years before, I'd brought home 1 C as my low grade, and I was grounded six weeks). Anyway, in response, she and a friend of hers stole Ralph's van and left. She reappeared about 24 hours later, in Northern Oklahoma - out of gas and out of money. It took an entire caravan to go get her.

I'm going to stop there before I get into a whole rant (I know - too late), and just say that I do trust my kids. They trust me also --- to bust their butts if they use one of 'my' vehicles without good reason.

Having said all that, I thanked Bryce very much for the work he'd done, and he and I went to the store. When we got back, we used the extra stuff he'd got to detail his kids.

I hadn't asked him to do this, and he hadn't offered - he'd just done it. I'm not sure if he was doing it because he felt bad, or that he needed to make something up, or if he was just being nice after having the grandmother's over. Whatever the reason, I felt it would insult him to pay him for his work. I did offer to pay for the materials, but he just told me 'it's okay' and refused to say how much he spent.

I am, however, going to ask him if he'd like to do it next time - with me buying the materials and paying him for his work. If he can do this good a job, I might as well keep it in the family.


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12 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Mon May 11, 2015 6:47 pm

talebearer


Cowboy
MemoryMan wrote:I'll thank Bryce

I'll praise the quality of his work.

..............and if I'm so hidebound by my rules that I think -in the circumstances- that the taking the keys is an issue then I don't deserve to have Bryce as my son.

Indeed. Shouldn't have took the keys but intent is what matters, and Bryce is contrite, trying to do the right thing and has done you a big favor. On balance, it's very much worth praising, and balance is what he should see.

Nice wheels, by the way.

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13 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Mon May 11, 2015 8:11 pm

StevieWeeks


Trailboss
Jack wrote:...received a lecture for bringing home a report card where her high grade was a 'C'... in gym! How do you make a 'C' in gym?

Stevie always used to get 'C's in gym... Embarassed

He was the fat asthmatic kid that no one ever wanted on their team...

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Stevie...


14 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Mon May 11, 2015 8:55 pm

1strappedboy


Sherrif
Katz hit it for me!

Thank this kid and indeed 'keep it in the family' henceforth!  Why pay an outsider if a kid of yours can do this as well?  Whatever his motivation, I believe the praise will go a long way towards assuaging his guilt for his wrongdoing is concerned. As regards a 'c' in gym- you KNOW what happened to my step-brother when HE brought home this grade in the subject-never happened again!! affraid

15 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Tue May 12, 2015 4:19 am

Jack


Admin
Stevie, where we attended school, if you showed up, suited out, and participated, you automatically got an A. It turned out later that Satana never even bothered to suit out half the time.


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16 Re: 11 May 2015: Now Bryce is Jagging Around! on Tue May 12, 2015 4:55 am

squarecutter


Sherrif
There are two factors with gym that means it shouldnt in my view be marked the same way  as acadmic work. Attitude and aptitude. I sympathise with Stevies tubby asthnmatic who clearly isnt going to go well in the gym. For me I adored ball games and wasnt too bothered about running but was hopeless with gym apparatus. I never got the hang of getting over the vaulting horse or climbing the rope. Something in me stopped me wanting to dive into a swimming pool.I was lucky no gym master made my life a misery as I know some people were not so lucky

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