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BOTD 05-24-2015 Break Free or Brake Free - An Ivor Production

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Skater


Bransom Postmaster
Break Free or Brake Free
An Ivor Production

This is your 12 year old son Noah:

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The only trouble is that Noah has been grounded for the weekend!

As soon as he sees you, Noah rides over and says:

"Hey, Dad you weren't around to ask (you had gone to the Hardware store) so I just took off as I couldn't stand being cooped up any longer. I was going to ask you to give me the spanking I'd earned so I could come out with the guys."

"Do you want me to come back home now or can it wait 'til later?"

"I can ride the bike standing up." he adds with a cheeky grin.

--------------------

Is he coming back home now?

Are you going to add any 'extras' for just taking off?

Or are you going to spank him and re-impose the grounding?


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1strappedboy


Sherrif
Oh Lord, this kid is TOAST!!! Twisted Evil

If I had the wherewithal to ground him and he the absolute NERVE to go out after that, he's probably getting a dozen of my best once he gets home unless he has a very good excuse!!

David M. Katz


Marshall
It seems we had some sort of "arrangement" and that a spanking was on the table but he elected the grounding in lieu of the spanking.

It also seems that the option of taking the spanking was still open.

I don't like him acting and deciding before talking with me.

I will take him home and we will talk. I think he will end up with the original spanking but I think he also needs to finish out today being grounded. I will spank him and then he will be free tomorrow morning.


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Stone Man


Marshall
If there was "some sort of arrangement", than I can go along with Katz. But the scenario never comes out and says it. That being the case, my boy is going to learn (or be reminded) that is isn't he who decides what the punishment will be and we don't change things for his convenience.

At this point, Noah is going to get two times the spanking as was originally proposed and still have to serve out his grounding. Twisted Evil

squarecutter


Sherrif
I agree with Katz, He doesn't just walk away from a grounding even with a spanking. This compounds the original offence and spanking alone doesn't cover it unless I'm going to be abusive

Jack


Admin
(The scenario doesn't say whether Noah had an option in this punishment - that would possibly effect how I react...)

The honest truth is, Noah is getting sent to his room, where he's going to wait until I'm calm enough to deal with him.

While I normally hate grounding, and even give the older boys an option most of the time, once a decision has been made, it's made. If I feel there's a reason to impose consequences, and I give you a choice, then you make the choice - you don't dither and dather and change your mind depending on what's most convenient for you at the moment.

My initial feeling - and I'm going to explain this to Noah - is that he's going to get a standard session for disobeying on the grounding, and then he'll finish his grounding, with an extra day added for the time he went out today.




If Noah didn't have input into being grounded, then hopefully I'll realize he's not mature enough to deal with grounding, and I'll fulfill his request (and it will be a deluxe for doing this on his own initiative), but he'd best expect to be going over my lap for the foreseeable future as well.


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Kat


Editor Extraordinaire
I'm with Katz.

Kat

Padraig


Trailboss
1strappedboy wrote:Oh Lord, this kid is TOAST!!! Twisted Evil

Aye.

talebearer


Cowboy
I'm curious what got him penned up for an entire weekend, esp. in warm weather (and I'm writing this on a three-day weekend here in the USA). Plus, penning up someone this energetic is going to run a high risk of him going AWOL.

He seems chipper enough about taking consequences, if they're prompt, certainly -- he just has a short memory, that's all. By all means take him home and settle accounts for breaking grounding + whatever got him confined to quarters in the first place. I believe he'll be feeling it the remainder of the weekend, which is something he won't skip out on so easily.

He probably has a good tan line, so the results, south of the border, should be colorful. Embarassed

http://www.malespank.net/listAuthor.php?author=Talebearer

Y Lee Coyote


Cowboy
One needs to make a very careful review of this.  There are lots of reports that solitary confinement is very detrimental to kids.  https://www.google.com/search?q=solitary+confinement+effects&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8  Sure this is at home but the isolation effect is still there.  Does the word abuse come to mind?

The kids is sending an important message and you better listen or things are going to get worse.

Y.

http://www.asstr.org/~YLeeCoyote/

1strappedboy


Sherrif
My goodness, Y. I knew there was a reason I hated grounding the kids beyond the obvious misery they create around the house when grounded! Now I can show a study that says 'spanking was the correct option'! Razz

Jack


Admin
Actually, the study shows that locking someone up for several weeks with no human interaction at all can cause harm. Keeping a kid in the house for the weekend, where he still interacts with his family, isn't near the same thing.

Having said that, I still think grounding is not a reasonable option in the vast majority of cases.


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Iconoclast


Trailboss
I am so happy that my son has given me a reason to NOT offer grounding as an option, thus making me into a jailer, that I am tempted to just forget the spanking and just say 'OK but spanking only no grounding as an optio hereafter"!

And Y Lee Coyote has given me even more reason to reject grounding as punishment!

Y Lee Coyote wrote:One needs to make a very careful review of this.  There are lots of reports that solitary confinement is very detrimental to kids.  https://www.google.com/search?q=solitary+confinement+effects&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8  Sure this is at home but the isolation effect is still there.  Does the word abuse come to mind?

The kids is sending an important message and you better listen or things are going to get worse.

Y.

Iconoclast

AFinch


Sherrif
I'm with Katz. And Jack. I'm sure that being grounded is more psychologically harmful than being spanked (as opposed to beaten) is physically harmful. But that's isolation grounding, not staying in the house. Either way, he doesn't get to decide. He's getting spanked for violating the grounding, and he's still serving his sentence.

Y Lee Coyote


Cowboy
Jack does make the valid point it not really a true isolation but, that said, one must consider a lot of factors including the age and maturity and duration.

In this case the kid clearly said this was too extreme.

One must remember the world is different now than even a few years ago.  Kids are in constant contact with each other and with lots of online stimulation constantly.  Stopping all that is very different than back in the 80's.

I will also note that the kids admits he earned some punishment but does not want to be tortured.

Since parents make wrong decision why can they allow that the kid made a bad choice and things must be re-evaluated.  It certainly would be reasonable that there are rules such as phones off from bedtime until breakfast, and homework before computer games e.g.

Y.

http://www.asstr.org/~YLeeCoyote/

Padraig


Trailboss
Y Lee Coyote wrote:

One must remember the world is different now than even a few years ago.  Kids are in constant contact with each other and with lots of online stimulation constantly.  Stopping all that is very different than back in the 80's.

On the other hand this might be an argument pro grounding, as long as one don't cut off the kid's online communication.

Nevertheless, the kid isn't the one to decide the punishment.

Y Lee Coyote


Cowboy
AFinch wrote:...serving his sentence.

I think that phase says volumes.   You sound like the Warden from a 1930 prison film rather than a loving father.  This is a boy not a criminal; not even a Juvenal delinquent.  It the mentality that gotten the police arresting unruly students and kindergarten boys being tagged as sex offenders.

Excuse me, I'm getting sick.

Y.

http://www.asstr.org/~YLeeCoyote/

MemoryMan


Sherrif
Was it an arbitrary grounding with no input from Noah?  The scenario doesn't say but since I don't discuss what punishment the miscreant would prefer it would be so.

I'm rather surprised at his openness and demeanour but deep down quite pleased that he's showing maturity and admitting that he deserves and is willing to accept punishment, but is demonstrating that in his view the grounding was ott.

I will in future listen to his views when deciding punishment.  Today? He can come home for a hiding when he's ready............ but then he'll find its certainly not a soft option.

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