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BOTD 08-29-2015 Is Resistance Futile? A DMK Production

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Bransom Postmaster
A DMK Production

Your ten year old son, Gabe, is subject to spanking as needed.  

Gabe attends a local private Christian school.  The school prefers to inform parents of any behavior issues and let the parents handle it.  Gabe just started fourth grade this year and has had a rough start behaviorally. School has been in session a little over a month. His teacher has twice this school year shared concerns that Gabe is disruptive by talking out of turn, getting out of his seat without permission and interrupting other students. Gabe did admit to the problem each time and so you had a serious discussion with him about it at home and even helped him with some strategies to stay on task.  On the last occurrence you told Gabe that any more behavior problems at school would earn him a spanking.

Today you picked up Gabe from school and his teacher asked to talk to you.  Gabe was again out of his seat and wandering around the classroom talking to other students.  You get Gabe to the car and ask him about it. Gabe admits to the behavior and then adds, "But I was finished with my work and I was bored."  You tell Gabe he will be getting a spanking when he gets home.  The rest of the ride home is quiet.

You get home and are walking to the house.  Gabe stops and defiantly refuses to go in the house.  He yells out at you, "I'm not coming in.  I don't want a spanking.  It's not fair."

GABE - 10
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What do you do?

Can you dig it?


I'm going to politely ask him to come in the house so we can talk about it. And if he refuses, I'm going to pick him up and carry him, kicking and screaming if necessary.

Once in the house, we will talk. I want to hear WHY Gabe thinks it isn't fair. He's been talked to about behavior a bunch of times. He's been told what will happen if there's a further occurrence. He admitted there WAS a re-occurence. I'm going to lead him through that entire scenario, and then ask him to explain why he thinks a spanking is undeserved and unfair. If he can give me a good answer, I'll rethink the sentence. I suspect, though, that he will, while being led through the scenario, agree that he deserves what he's been promised, and that he'll submit to it.

If he doesn't, I don't think that wrestling with an "older kid" (as opposed to a 4 year old) is productive. But in that case, at the tender age of 10, he will discover the joys of total seclusion--bed, desk, bedside lamp, no electronics, books, or anything else, and no coming out of his room for any reason other than meals, school, or toilet. I'm pretty sure he'll quickly beg for a spanking instead.

John Boy

Ditto Kier


Editor Extraordinaire
I also agree with Kier, but I think I also have some questions for myself and perhaps both Gabe's teacher from last year and his current teacher. Is the misbehavior something new for him? If it isn't new, I might need to consider having him evaluated for various learning disabilities. If the behavior is new, then I want to look for things that may have affected Gabe. For instance, he claims to be bored in class. Is his new teacher experienced and effective as a classroom manager; does (s)he have enrichment activities for kids who are moving more rapidly than the majority of the class; does Gabe have something he can read if he finishes work early; is there a personality conflict between Gabe and his teacher -- or between Gabe and some other kid?

I'll definitely need to hear Gabe's side of the story. If there is a problem in the classroom, perhaps I can work with the teacher to resolve it.


Last edited by Kat on Sat Aug 29, 2015 7:33 am; edited 1 time in total


I'm largely in the K Klub on this one, though I'm having a bit of heartburn at the concept of a 10 year old directly defying me like that. I think that besides attending to the questions of why, we will certainly be having an over the knee chat about saying "NO" in that manner. At only 10, resistance IS futile!


I think there are two issues here but if Gabe is admitting to the behaviours mentioned he is highly unlikely to avoid a spanking whatever. That is his problem. He cannot willy nilly disrupt his classmates education evenif he is getting through his work faster than them. Its not fair on those who arent as sharp. That will be Gabes problem

I expect he will tell me the teacher or the class he's in is not stretching him and I will be checking with the teacher that his is sufficiently good quality to justify finishing it so fast If so that is mine and the Schools problem as it will be clear Gabe needs an advancement to a different stream or to skip a year or even go somewhere else if he is that good. But I need to revert back to te school on that

For now though,Sorry Gabe but for reasons in my first para but you WILL be getting that spanking and at ten While I dont want to physically overcome you and would you I would prefer you to accept the faults on your side and what is coming. You were warned after all


It appears that Gabe I no longer the little angel he used to be.

From the scenario he has previously given no explanation for why his behaviour has deteriorated this year so I am more inclined to think it is down to him rather than his teacher.

Coming from an era when one didn't talk in class let alone even think about getting out of your seat and wandering about, I find it had to have much sympathy for Gabe.

I've told him what would happen and I'm going to deliver - even if that means carrying him into the house kicking and screaming.


Gabe said: "But I was finished with my work and I was bored."

It may be Gabe is board because the work is too slow for him. Intelligent kids often have this problem and the solution is either acceleration or home (online) education, but NOT forcing him to stay with the slow kids.



Iconoclast wrote:Gabe said:   "But I was finished with my work and I was bored."

It may be Gabe is board because the work is too slow for him.  Intelligent kids often have this problem and the solution is either acceleration or home (online) education, but NOT forcing him to stay with the slow kids.


Maybe so--but one still has to learn how to behave appropriately in public, and that includes sitting still in class, or church, or a "partner's meeting", even when you're bored out of your mind.


Ditto Dimitri and the general consensus

Hugs kal

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