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BOTD 3/20/16 "In Flagrente" A Memory Man Production

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David M. Katz

In Flagrente
A Memory Man Production

Your 13½yo son Vance has accompanied you on a visit to a sick elderly relative.  He was at a loose end and - having neglected to bring his swim trunks - he went skinny dipping in the nearby river which is overlooked by a seldom used public path.

Currently he is dressed and waiting in the garden as you are attempting to placate an outraged middle aged lady.

You finally manage to dissuade her from calling the cops by promising condign consequences.

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What will they be?

Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.


There will be NO consequences as soon as I get rid of the silly prude!


Pi Beta

I'm going to assume that he has heard the conversation, the shock and outrage expressed by the "lady" and my promises to deal with him. I'm sure that I wouldn't have described to or actually promised the lady quite what his punishment would be and will have left her and Vance imagining the severe consequences of his self-exposure.

What Vance has done is not illegal. Quoting "Nowadays swimming costumes are the norm, but there is no law against skinny dipping. In England and Wales indecent “exposure” is covered by the Sexual Offenders Act 2003 (part 66) which defines an offence if (a) a man intentionally exposes his genitals, and (b) he intends that someone will see them and be caused alarm or distress, punishable by up to two years’ imprisonment. Exposure is only an offence if the man (and the law does not seem to include women) exposes himself in order to cause alarm or distress."

Having chosen a quiet rarely frequented spot, it's clear that he didn't intend to be seen in this state nor did he do it to cause alarm or distress, even if the lady claims that this was what he did cause.

I'm going to get him to tell me exactly what punishment he thinks he should suffer, bearing in mind the lady's perceived outrage and my response - and then give him precisely nothing apart from an arm round the shoulder and advise him to be more careful in future! The lady. meanwhile, can have her own (wet?) dreams imagining the punishment I will have exacted from Vance.


I think I'll point out to Vance that (as he should now realize) this was an extremely bad idea. The really silly thing is, he could easily have swam in his underpants, then put his shorts back on when he was through.

As it is, besides reminding him to think about things, I think he's been 'dealt with' enough.

"In the end, it's just a story. But if you ask me, it's all true."

David M. Katz

I am maintaining the consensus.

Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.


In ipsa adhuc flagrante crimine comprehensus - praecipiam ei poena erit.

The problem is - there is no crime. No crime, no punishment.

Ego conveniunt.


Editor Extraordinaire
What is it with these prudish middle-aged and elderly ladies? I don't have much sympathy for people who in her position. To avoid offense, all she had to do was look away. I think he's already had a substantial punishment in the form of embarrassment.



I agree with everyone else. No punishment.


Vance really should know better than to let his end go loose Embarassed

I think I should call Vance over and tell him to drop his shorts and bend over in front of the lady. Let's see just how embarrassed she is then!


Pi Beta has the best response for methough in future I d like Vance to check with me in advance which I accept can't be as spontaneous, but, thats modern life

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