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BOTD 02-15-2017 Been There, Done That - An 18Smacked Production

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Skater

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Bransom Postmaster
BEEN THERE, DONE THAT
An 18Smacked Production


Like all kids your two sons, Sean 14 and Stan, 12, have gotten mad at you for any number of reasons and back-talked you.  In the past, you have grounded, restricted, consequenced, and even spanked when they back-talked you, but invariably, they did it again; it was simply a matter of time before it happened.

SEAN - 14 & STAN - 12
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Is there is something that can be done that will actually teach them something here, and have them learn not to back-talk?

Well, what can a parent do that will actually teach something here?


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Beaver

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Wrangler
Maybe the spankings were not hard enough and I need to leave a longer-lasting impression. Soap in the mouth might also help. Twisted Evil

My honest take is that thinking only in terms of consequences is the wrong approach. First, I should question myself and ask whether I am maybe setting a bad example: Do I weigh my words carefully when talking to others, do I show the respect that I demand or am I guilty of the same sins as my boys? Modeling behavior is my strongest asset to teach my boys, so I should try that first. Assuming that the root of the problem lies not there, I should ask myself whether there might be any emotional issues that compel the boys to talk back a lot, and if so address them. Only as a third part would I start thinking about consequences. And while one is easily inclined to punish misbehavior, one should not forget to praise and reward the behavior one wants: So instead of only catching all instances where they talk back (and punish them for these), I should also watch out for instances of the opposite behavior and praise those.

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db105

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Trailboss
What's the problem? There's always more spanks where the previous ones came from. Let's provide consistency and consequences and they will learn at their own pace.Twisted Evil

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ivor

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Marshall
Can't disagree with DB. Laughing

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kalico

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Sherrif
Ditto Db........



Hugs kal

Jack

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Admin
I have to ask, if they keep doing this, am I being too picky? Do they understand what I mean by 'back-talk'? Am I modelling good behavior, or am I constantly sassing them and being rude, while expecting them to do as I say, not as I do?

Maybe I should add back talk to the swear jar?


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db105

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Trailboss
Jack wrote:
Maybe I should add back talk to the swear jar?

Aww, but don't you see how spankable they are? Razz

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Jack

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db105 wrote:
Jack wrote:
Maybe I should add back talk to the swear jar?

Aww, but don't you see how spankable they are? Razz

I know you're joking, but that's actually a problem for me. I do so enjoy spanking boys, and there are so many cute, lovable, spankable boys around here that I sometimes find myself not spanking because I can't be positive if they really deserve it, or if I'm trying to justify reddening those pretty little bottoms. That's why I tend to be a rules lawyer, so there's no question as to whether a spanking was earned or not.


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db105

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Trailboss
Yes, I was joking, but I appreciate how it can be a problem in real life. My serious real life response would be that I would find some way to speak to them about this and try to teach them how they can argue and defend their opinions without crossing the line.

Still, BOTD is.more fun for me if it's not always so serious, so I'll keep my original response: they know the rules, so if they talk back too much they are asking for a spanking. Sooner or later they'll learn. Twisted Evil

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squarecutter

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Sherrif
Depends to what level and when for me. Is it bantering or rude, Is it to impress their friends, If it to gets to insolence or insubordination in font of the others I will paddle them. Actually though Id quite like to know whats eating them and fo that I need to eep lines of communication. So without waning to be the heavy someone has to be in charge and deserves a little respect. Think I leave it at that

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