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26 May 2017 - Fallout

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1 26 May 2017 - Fallout on Thu May 25, 2017 4:59 pm

Jack

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Admin
Your 19-year old son got caught in trying to play a senior prank last night. He was caught trying to break into the school. You found out about all this at 12:30 am this morning, when you were called to go pick him up. At 11am this morning, you have an appointment (along with the other boys involved and their parents) to find out what his (their) punishment will be.

Finally morning comes (and you're not in good temper, both because of short sleep and because of a headache. And that's when your son, Zeke asks what your plans are for today, and where you're eating lunch. THAT is when you remember that you promised to take Zeke to work with you today, and do some things together when work is over.


Zeke - 20 going on 12

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You explain the situation to Zeke, and how you really have no choice. Zeke really doesn't want to hear it, and he's obviously hurt. You offer to do it tomorrow instead, but he says, "I can't. I have a test tomorrow. Not that you really care!" And he storms off.

You try to explain it again before he leaves for school, but he ignores you. When he gets home from school that afternoon, he won't even answer you.

Do you continue trying to apologize, or talk about his manners in a more direct manner?


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2 Re: 26 May 2017 - Fallout on Thu May 25, 2017 5:31 pm

AFinch

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Sherrif
He may be chronologically 20, but he's emotionally 12.

I'll give him some space, and then try to talk to him again. I'll point out whatever the areligious version of "man plans and God laughs" is, and remind him again that I had no choice in the matter. I'd certainly rather be spending the day doing something fun with him than dealing with a serious problem with his brother. I'll try to make up for it, but ultimately, he's going to have to "man up" and understand. I can't see how punishing him for feeling hurt is going to make anything better.

3 Re: 26 May 2017 - Fallout on Thu May 25, 2017 6:07 pm

Adric

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I'm with Kier.

http://www.malespank.net/listAuthor.php?author=Adric

4 Re: 26 May 2017 - Fallout on Thu May 25, 2017 6:28 pm

18Smacked

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And, I agree with Kier and Adric.

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5 Re: 26 May 2017 - Fallout on Thu May 25, 2017 10:25 pm

Kat

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Editor Extraordinaire
I'm with Kier also.

Kat

6 Re: 26 May 2017 - Fallout on Fri May 26, 2017 12:14 am

Journey


Greenhorn
I agree. (Also, could the areligious version of "Man plans and God laughs" possibly be "The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry"?)

7 Re: 26 May 2017 - Fallout on Fri May 26, 2017 1:26 am

David M. Katz

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Marshall
Keeping it unanimous. Very Happy


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8 Re: 26 May 2017 - Fallout on Fri May 26, 2017 4:39 am

Jack

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Since this seems to be pretty anonymous, I will go ahead and respond now.

Just in case you haven't answered yet, and don't want to know:


This is a semi-real life event. Zeke had asked to stay home Monday, which I wasn't against, but my Monday is usually 90% paperwork, so I suggested Tuesday instead. He was fine with that, but then John and Co pulled their stunt, and I had to be at school, and wouldn't be going to work. Zeke wasn't quite as worked up as I suggested, though he was obviously disappointed, and he did have a test on Wednesday (and I admire that he admitted that, instead of taking advantage). We simply moved things to Thursday. I didn't go to work for long, but he was happy enough to go to grocery shopping with me, we did have to go to the store, and then we went shopping for him some summer stuff. It was a pretty darned good day.


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9 Re: 26 May 2017 - Fallout on Fri May 26, 2017 11:18 am

kalico

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Sherrif
Even though I read the out come I'm with the others....

Happy you were able to find a day that worked for the both of you and you both enjoyed your time together....

P.s. At first I couldn't even think that one of your boys would even think like that so I was happy to see that part wasn't quite right... I get feeling a bit upset but it just didn't sound right coming from one of yours


Hugs kal

10 Re: 26 May 2017 - Fallout on Fri May 26, 2017 3:34 pm

Jack

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Kal, in large part, I understand what you're saying. What you have to understand though is that I just don't have enough time to give each kid the personal, one on one time he deserves. That's usually not a problem, but some of these boys are really not in a great place emotionally (Zeke, Liam, even maybe Greg and John). I consider myself blessed at how well they are doing, but one of my worst nightmares is one of them acting out because I can't give him the one on one time he deserves and needs. I hadn't thought of this yesterday, but that might have been the real inspiration for this.


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